We all try to get along with others and please them, at least to an extent, and that sometimes results in doing things we really don’t feel like doing. But putting yourself last can lead to resentment, stress and a negative impact on health.
Discovering yourself (the first step to making better choices)
Understanding who you are at the core, and knowing your true preferences, and the reasons for your choices, is not as easy as it seems, because getting to know yourself is a process. It takes time. To get you on that road, ask yourself these questions:
- What do you like?
- Do you like something simply because someone else likes it?
- Do you look to others for advice for every decision you make?
- When you make a decision, is it what you want, or is it a decision that is aligned with someone else’s preference?
- What are your values?
- Are your choices representative of those values?
Learning to Say No
Looking closer at your likings and examining your decisions is just the beginning of self-discovery. It is important because if you say yes to every invitation or every request without proper consideration, you may end up making decisions that are not aligned with your values.
For now, just keep this in mind: if you do the right thing for you–not necessarily what seems right to others–you will begin to make decisions that lead to a more authentic life. And you cannot make a mistake! Every decision you make paves the way for personal growth and a more peaceful, satisfying existence.
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